....

A: What do you mean, I'm "an Iraqi"?

Q: No, I meant the subject - phone boxes - some folks would say it's a bit "anoraky", isn't it?

A: Oh, "anoraky"! How do you mean?

Q: Well, I mean, phone boxes - you know, bit sad, isn't it? Like, there was some bloke on Radio 2, the other day, talking about his Basil Brush website, and it was sad. I mean, the guy was old.

A: Well, when it comes to the internet, I think there's a lot sadder, Sophie - know what I mean? And isn't Radio 2 a bit "anoraky"? Boom boom!

Q: No way! It's the coolest station in the nation, mate.

A: Yeah, sure. Like Steve Wright would say, terrific, great, that's just fantastic. And anyhow, aren't you taping this for Payphone Monthly?

Q: Er, that's right. I forgot. Let's move on. So you think these flippin' phone boxes are cool, do you?

A: Well, I do think the Giles Gilbert Scott Kiosk 6 is right up there with the Eiffel Tower, the Parthenon...

Q: The eighth wonder of the world?

A: Ask me another question.

Q: What age are you?

A: Time of interview, 35.

Q: What have you against the newer boxes?

A: Firstly, they're not buildings, not architecture. Purely functional with built-in obsolescence, by which I mean that they can't even withstand the temperate, if often dreary, British climate. Already, they're warping, their doors not closing properly, so forth. Aesthetically, they're not really that bad - they just don't fit the British urban or rural landscapes. They can look very drab and might look better in doors, or on the streets of North America, though they'd hardly cope with the harsh extremes of weather there.

Q: Some people have complained that the site isn't very informative.

A: Listen, I hate reading things on the internet. Unless the display technology changes, I - and many others like me - will always prefer to read stuff in print. It could be because I work in reprographics, and don't want to spend my leisure time staring at a monitor any longer than necessary. It's basically a visual site, for the amatuer enthusiast. If people want to research the whole thing further, I think I've supplied enough LINKS to start them on their trip. Good luck to them.

Q: What gave you the idea for the site?

A: It was originally just a page on Police Boxes for my scrapbook-like Dr Who site, based on personal photos and research from an A-level Art project from nineteen-canteen. Then, when I realised how much info I had on phone boxes in general, I broadened the scope of the thing and solicited a lot of photos from other websites, so forth. The whole point of the exercise is the sharing of knowledge and information, which is, to me, the internet at its best, and I can't see anything "anoraky" or "sad" about that.

Q: OK, so why are phone boxes so important to you?

A: Well, for one thing, luv, I don't have a mobile phone. I had one once and I hate them. Plus, the design of phone boxes - like the design of so much street furniture - either enhances the social environment, or it doesn't. Why else do the middle classes make sure that protection orders are slapped on any Jubilee boxes near their own homes, or buy them for their gardens, while the rest of us are left with upturned fish tanks to either pee in or chuck our tinfoil take-away garbage in while we're phoning for a taxi?

Q: So, you blame modern street-furniture design for anti-social behaviour?

A: I wouldn't say the two were unrelated, no.

Q: See what I mean. Flipping anorak!

A: OK, if you won't listen to me, click HERE and read it and weep!